Friday, March 6, 2009

Family First?

This is a topic that weighs on my mind from time to time and I was wondering what you all thought about it. Are you the type that sticks by your family no matter what, or do you treasure your friends more than your blood relatives?

It's no secret that Brian and I have had some challenging days in our lives, and who hasn't? I've learned that sometimes on your hardest day it isn't your family that comes to save you. Sometimes it is a neighbor you've never met before, like the strangers who stopped and helped Brian pull so many things out of our burning barn. Sometimes it's the friends you don't see often enough that call and take your mind off your troubles.

I've seen some families stick by each other even after years of bad behavior and through lies, alcoholism, or other challenging times. Where do you draw the line? Do you always forgive and look the other way because he/she is your _____(aunt, father, son, etc.)?

I personally have found so much value in my friends, and parts of my family, that I don't see how blood changes things much. I'm not saying I don't value my family, but I don't think I'd base my best relationships on that at all. Thoughts?

BTW, these pictures are of some of the great "family" that came and helped us later on the day of the fire. When "the show was over" and everyone else had gone home these are the people who were there saying, "What else can we do?". It is hard to forget that! :)


Farmer's Daughter said...

My extended family is closer than most. We grew up on the farm with most of our cousins, so to us, they're more like brothers and sisters, and our aunts, uncles and grandparents are all close as well. We have fights, but we always seem to get over them and move on to work well together.

I also have some really great friends, the kind of friends that you can see only once a year or less, but it still feels like no time has passed. I'm getting together with a few of my high school girlfriends tonight, actually, and I'm looking forward to hearing everyone's updates. I last saw them around Christmas, so we've met more often this year than we have since high school when we spent every day and night together.

I'm sure it'll be a fun night!

Jena said...

That sounds like the way family should be. I like it that the farm helped your family to stay close. This is one reason I tease Brian that we need to have lots of kids, so they will always have family to rely on!

My cousins have been some of my closest friends too. Most of us drifted apart through HS but we're all reconnecting again. It helps that we're all going through the same things (engagements, weddings, etc.) so we have that in common to talk about.

Sound like you do have a great group of friends! I hope you had fun. :)

Everydaywoman said...


I shouldn't answer this on the grounds that it might incriminate me . . . but I know what you mean about some friends being more reliable and closer than some family members. After all, we got to PICK our friends, don't we?

But, I think it's probably true that "blood is thicker" because we have also weathered some tragic family events that we are bound together by. Thick or thin, family comes together, especially on my husband's side with the farming family. Not to say there haven't been some serious spats too, when sometimes everyone sees everyone TOO much!